In case you missed it, Botswana University had a great day to remember on the 9th of February 2017 when over 400 hundred students paid due honor to their management with the biggest feast ever recorded in the history of the Millennials. I was going about my everyday routine of early morning prayers in my two-bedroom Mmadikolo apartment, my baby was still sleeping and my husband was out early for a 7 o’clock class. On that day, I felt a great weight of happiness in my soul; life had never been so kind to me before I came to this institution. I went out to express to my neighbors how happy I was feeling, (I couldn’t hold it in anymore!) when I looked out from the balcony to see a vast hoard of joyful students eagerly running to pay due honor to Botswana University staff. I immediately joined the bubbly happy crew.
I must admit, the merrymaking was rampant. On this particular day it was actually because the students (me included) received their free pocket money on time. One can only imagine the sheer joy. Moreover, the student marriages that took place during the December break were also scheduled for celebration on that very day. The humble staff was pleasantly surprised by the tribute, that the elders of the board called for an instant celebration. The best catering company since the era of cafeterias was called for the occasion. Over 400 hundred students gathered in front of the administration building to sing the humble staff the lunch time song in Zulu, which talks about gunning down a fat animal for the people’s lunch time. It was the most beautiful rendition I had ever heard. At this point there were tears of joy in the students’ eyes, proudly singing for the caring staff and wowing them with their best choir voices. The ReMmadikolo choir is great indeed!
While this happened, the moghul wheeled in the finest of chicken with savory cockroach powder under its skin, with the fluffiest phaleche cooked in first-grade hairy water. Hey, just hold your heart, I know it sounds too good to be true. But I was there! When the staff thought it was all over, the little sister curry pot brought forward the most delicious chicken liver braised in the student’s tears of joy and the prettiest camouflage flies for dessert, and get me right-it was for FREE! To be honest, I have witnessed that the rapport between Botswana University staff is amazing; the kindness they show to one another is a complete cacophony of love and respect. If you are constantly fighting with your boss, this is a good area to envy.
The students expressed their gratitude to the helpful most caring staff for the admission there, as most of us have left our dingy poverty-stricken village homes to live in the most luxurious student houses in Botswana with amenities bo Kim Kardashiam could only dream of. We have the chance to eat the most affordable gourmet meals and attend lecturers by world-renowned professors who studied difficult things in faraway places just for us—while we’re being paid over a thousand shillings just to do so! Which other country can top that? Huh? A trouble-making rebellious gang of intellectuals headed by a certain Robert I’m sure wouldn’t know.
The last item on the menu was a fattened gracious male zebra. The 400 hundred students were indeed thankful, as they prepared zebra pepper steaks for the staff, of which they purchased for over 600 million shillings they obtained from the sales of the 2016 ReMmadikolo debut album Bula Sekele: Mocha O Chele.